Control What You Can, Communicate What You Can’t: Learning from Guest Reviews

In hospitality, one thing rings true: the guest experience is often what the guest makes of it.

Some folks step into a hotel and see charm, warmth, and all the thoughtful touches. Others might zero in on a smudge on a mirror, a room that’s not as large as they imagined, or a small hiccup during check-in.

That’s the nature of humanity. People are different. Some folks notice the good; others can’t help but focus on the bad.

As professionals in the hospitality industry, this variety is our reality. It’s also our opportunity. Because while we can’t control every aspect of human perception, we can control how we respond, learn, and grow. Let’s talk about what we can take away from guest reviews—the good, the bad, and the downright bizarre—and how we can stay true to why we’re in this business in the first place.

Let’s start with the tough stuff: bad reviews. They sting. Whether they’re unfair, exaggerated, or spot-on, it’s easy to get discouraged. But bad reviews aren’t just a slap on the wrist—they’re also a lesson.

Sometimes they show us where we’ve truly missed the mark. Maybe your check-in process has grown sluggish over time. Maybe a housekeeper didn’t catch a detail they should have. Maybe your website unintentionally gave guests the wrong expectations. These are areas where we can improve. And when we do, we create better experiences for future guests.

But sometimes bad reviews reflect things we can’t easily change. Your rooms are described as “too small.” Your property is in a bustling urban area, and the street noise bothers light sleepers. These are realities of your space. They’re not flaws—they’re features that just don’t work for everyone. Here, the opportunity lies in setting clearer expectations. Describe rooms as “cozy” or “intimate” rather than implying they’re expansive. Highlight the vibrancy of your location while suggesting earplugs for light sleepers.

Every guest walks through your doors with expectations—some fair, some lofty, some completely out of left field. As hospitality professionals, our job is to exceed expectations where it truly matters. But first, we have to set them properly.

For instance:

When guests know what to expect, they’re far more likely to appreciate what you do offer.

And where expectations are set, we have the chance to surprise and delight. A hand-written note for a guest celebrating an anniversary. Complimentary drinks when the Wi-Fi goes down. A quick upgrade when a room opens up. These small touches turn satisfied guests into raving fans.

Let’s be honest. Not every guest will be happy, no matter what you do. Some people are just wired to find fault. They’ll complain about things beyond anyone’s control—like the weather or the fact that the beach wasn’t sandy enough. These reviews can frustrate even the most patient hospitality professionals.

But here’s the hard truth: kindness isn’t conditional.

How many times in your life have you had a bad day, snapped at someone, or left an unfair critique—and someone responded with grace? It’s humbling. It’s memorable. It’s rare. And as hospitality professionals, we get to be those people. Even when someone doesn’t “deserve” it, we can choose kindness. Not because it’s easy, but because it’s the heart of hospitality.

It’s tough to stomach feedback that isn’t grounded in reality. A guest writes that your staff was rude when, in truth, they were bending over backward to help. A complaint blames you for a maintenance issue you couldn’t have foreseen. It happens.

In these moments, the key is to step back, breathe, and respond calmly. Thank the guest for their feedback, acknowledge their experience, and offer a solution if one exists. And then, let it go. Don’t let one unfair review define your property or your team. Remember: even the best hotels in the world have their share of one-star reviews.

Here’s the golden rule of reviews: focus on what you can control.

If check-in is slow, you can invest in staff training, streamline your processes, or implement technology to make it faster. If cleanliness is a recurring issue, you can tighten protocols or hire additional team members. If noise complaints keep popping up, you can provide white noise machines or extra insulation.

But some things are beyond your control. You can’t make your rooms larger without massive renovations. You can’t eliminate city noise. You can’t change the weather. In these cases, focus on managing expectations and communicating transparently.

For every problem, there’s a solution—or at least a strategy. And when you address what you can change, guests notice.

At the end of the day, hospitality is about people. It’s about creating spaces where guests feel welcomed, cared for, and at home. It’s about the mom visiting your city for the first time, the business traveler needing a quiet place to recharge, and the couple celebrating their 25th anniversary. It’s about them—and it’s also about us.

Why did you get into this industry? For most of us, it wasn’t for the perfect five-star reviews or the glowing write-ups on TripAdvisor. It was to serve. To connect. To create experiences that matter. To offer grace when it’s undeserved and kindness when it’s unexpected.

Not every guest will love what we do. And that’s okay. Because for every tough critic, there’s a guest who’ll tell you they felt seen, appreciated, and cared for.

And that’s why we keep going.

So, what can we take from all this? Here’s the simple takeaway: Listen. Learn. Improve where you can. Communicate where you can’t. And above all, keep showing up with kindness, grace, and a heart for hospitality.

Because while the guest experience might be what the guest makes it, the way we respond? That’s all on us.